Gilded Fish

In anticipation of the next upcoming SPARK round, and because I've been in contact with someone and looking forward to some art/poetry collaborations, I figured it was about time to sit down and try and get back into the groove. For some reason I feel naturally drawn to write in ballad meter. Not sure why. I guess I like the sing-songy nature of the prosody, and I feel an overwhelming urge to rhyme when I write poetry, so in both respects it works. Though it is really annoying when I try to write something more free and I wind up relegating myself to a regular meter like this.

Anyway, I tapped this out, very rough, but I kinda like it. I think because ballad sort of sounds very old-fashioned, so my wording and grammar turns out a little old-fashioned, too. It fits. Any comments would be appreciated, if you liked it, didn't like it, suggestions on how to make it better, parts that weren't very readable, and keep in mind this is the first draft (that is, if I ever re-write it. If I don't, this is the first and only draft!). Whatever the case, I hope you enjoy:

Gilded Fish


Little gilded fish
dressed in shining scales
golden ones above her brow
and silver on her tail

Swim, fish, swim
across the ocean vast
Swim, fish, swim
to arrive at home at last.

The current swept her far away
into many perils anew
and though her fears were mighty strong
she was stronger and swam through

A deviled canyon met her eyes
bubbles rising from the pit
she tightly shut those gleaming eyes
and swam right over it.

Swim, fish, swim
across the ocean vast
Swim, fish, swim
to arrive at home at last.

Tentacles reached out to pull
her in their squirming grip
she swiftly swished her shining tail
and out of reach she slipped.

A school of fish she then did cross
following the current
with them she did swim along
until her strength was spent.

Swim, fish, swim
across the ocean vast
swim, fish, swim
to arrive at home at last.

Tired and sore she had to rest
before her fins gave out
a rocky cave she snuck inside
then heard a mighty shout.

A slithering eel disclosed himself
and snapped his jaws so mean
but gilded fish was much too quick
the fastest he had seen.

Swim, fish, swim
across the ocean vast
swim, fish, swim
to arrive at home at last.

Exhausted was the little fish
she merely drifted on
no more swimming could she do
'til she heard a familiar song.

“Shining scales in sunlight
glimmering in moon.
Coral for your playground
night time comes too soon.

Sleep, sleep my little fish
a night rest you must take
and mother’s fin will hold you safe
Til the morning when you wake.”

Mama fish pulled her in
and kissed her glittering cheek
and gilded fish she settled down
for about a week.

Swim, fish, swim
across the ocean vast
swim, fish, swim
she arrived at home at last

Life went back to normal
or so the mama thought
the little fish remained uneasy
and dreamed of what she sought.

The ocean placed a longing
deep within her heart
in her reef she could not stay
she knew that she would part

from all the things she used to know
and all the things she loved
to find her place among the waves
whether beneath them or above.

She no longer feared the open sea
that had shaken her quivering core
now she gladly did embrace it
and went swimming back for more.

Swim, fish, swim
into the ocean vast
swim, fish, swim
to arrive at home at last.

© Elizabeth Cordes, 2011