Not Fitting In

And I'm not even talking about socially, which has always been an issue with  me. I get along with most everyone, but never quite feel like I'm a part of that "inner circle." I kind of straddle the line of that circle more often than not. But that's not what I want to talk about. What I'm talking about is support groups.

The point of finding a support group is to be able to talk about similar issues you all share. It's really sucky when you feel like you don't even fit in with people that have the same disease as you. And by disease, I mean PCOS. I know I've mentioned it a few times here already so I won't go into what that entails. I've joined a few online support forums for women with PCOS and still find that I don't fit in with them. We all have the same underlying  medical issues, and most are going through similar life-setbacks. But not me! Oh no, of course not me.

It seems that the vast majority of women who have PCOS are either dealing with obesity linked to insulin resistance, or are dealing with infertility, also rooted with the insulin resistance. I am, at this moment, unsure whether I am seriously IR or not. I am definitely not obese, and I do not have to deal with infertility as I am not TTC (as this demographic refers to "trying to conceive").

I also do not feel depressed or emotionally lost because of my diagnosis. I realize that, yes, I may have trouble in the future if I ever face the chance to have another child, but even then, I can't imagine ever being completely overwhelmed by the trials that are potentially awaiting me. Maybe it's because I already have a kid? Maybe because getting married and wanting another kid isn't something I actually see in my near future? This situation is unreal to me, so I cannot reasonably relate to all these other women's feelings about it.

Most newbie posts have been pretty negative, like it's suddenly the end of the world. I can't feel that way. To me, it's just a health issue that can be effectively managed and controlled. There's no sense in worrying about possible fertility issues when I'm not dealing with them today. Today is what counts. If I spent all my time worrying about the future, I wouldn't even notice my todays.